blog.

The enemy would love nothing more than to confuse, discourage or lead you off track. His desire grows greater when he sees you living in alignment of the plan and purpose God has for you. This can come in attacks, single-handed or in multiple, one after another. It can leave you disoriented, feeling your feet slipping beneath you. I too have been there.

In some ways, the past few years have been tough. Each step I would take closer to continued alignment of Gods plan, would bring attacks. In the loss and grief of a second miscarriage, relational strain, or in a body that felt as though it was failing me as I was unexpectedly diagnosed with Type 1 – late adult onset. These were just a few of the things during an already exhausting COVID season in a global pandemic that God turned for good. And friend, that is just my story, and my season. You have one too, and it matters. All of it.

The good news friend is that there were also so many beautiful moments. We have a choice. Instead of letting the attacks of life take us down, lets together let them grow us closer to God, expand us in our faith, and build us in a life of resilience. Let us choose to recognize the beauty in our midst. Living a life of resilience does not mean that we are numb or free from the feeling of pain or disappointment, but rather, it means that we don’t have to stay there. We have the intentional choice to be made deep within us to stay, or to move through, building stronger forward, in the hope of Jesus. God is with you. God is for you. God is working. Even when we don’t feel it.

Let us not get caught up in the problems or circumstances of this world, but rather, let us battle like a soldier of Christ Jesus. Growing and living in resilience, not from our strength but His.

Let’s choose to live into the fullness that God offers, choosing to see the way He has worked through each hardship and aligned our steps for His good. It isn’t easy. It is often hard. But yet, so fulfilling to look back and see the work that He has done.

He provides in ways only He can, and has moved me through the grief of another lost child, the restoration of relationships, and helped me discover what it means to live with T1D. He can and will provide a way for you too. This I believe.

Wherever you find yourself, know that there is a battle worth fighting. You are not alone. Take heart.

“Take with me your share of hardship [passing through the difficulties which you are called to endure], like a good soldier of Christ Jesus. No soldier in active service gets entangled in the [ordinary business] affairs of civilian life; [he avoids them] so that he may please the one who enlisted him to serve” – 2 Timothy 2:3-4 [AMP]

Do you remember life as your littlest self? Where you could be anything you wanted, and your imagination ran wild because fear did not yet cripple you? As I was picking up the living room (for the 100^th time), I came across Lilah’s art pad. As I flipped through, page after page was filled with images of color, relationship, rainbows, and possibility.

My prayer is that she never loses her curiosity, wonder, and imagination. That she always remembers that she is set apart in this world. I pray that she never be crippled by fear, but instead, remembering whose she is. I pray that she always has the ability to express herself, growing into the truest version of her.

Maybe you need this reminder today too. What is that thing or experience that is holding you back? Imagine you as your five-year-old self. What did you dream of and hope for? What would your pictures have looked like? Maybe, instead of rainbows, and possibility, your pictures hold grief, loss, or disappointment, or the feeling of never measuring up.

If you could go back, what would you remind yourself of?

I know I would tell my younger version to be gentler and kinder with myself. I would remind myself God is for me.

And friend. Let me remind you.. God is for YOU. He has plans for you. Your future is bright.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” – Jeramiah 29:11

Who knew Menards would be the place that I would be given a powerful reminder? Tonight, my husband and I just had our son with us. Our daughter was on a special night away with her Nana. As we were wandering Menards – in part looking for sprinkler heads and part pure exploration, we took our time. We lingered. We found ourselves going down isles for no reason other than to be curious and be without hurry. To be together. Most often, we go in with a mission, and a timeline. Tonight, it was different.

As we headed toward the check out at the end of our visit, I turned my eyes from the items lined up on shelves around me, and the (already displayed) Halloween décor that intrigued my sweet Aiden. It was then, that I was caught in my tracks of the sweet reminder that was right in front of me and had been the whole way through the store. My husband, walking Aiden in the cart, but with it backwards. Aiden was in the front, facing out looking at the world around him, and Elliot behind. Squeals and giggles as he was head on.

In this moment, it reminded me to pause and ask:

Who is turning your cart around for you in the midst of your journey, to help you see clearly at what is in front of you, instead of what is behind?

Who is the person that is showing up to give you a better picture or vantage point, even if it may not be the most convenient for them? An opportunity to experience, awe and wonder, even if in this case, it was simply looking for the Halloween display with glowing eyes and items on the shelves.

And then..

Is there someone who you could be tuning the cart around for?

Who needs you to be that person, to go out of your way, to give them a better vantage point? Maybe in the slower pace, the better seat, a word of encouragement, truth spoken over them when the false narratives replay in their minds.  

To some, it was just a dad being silly pushing the cart the wrong direction. But to me. And to Aiden. That was a dad, choosing to give his son the best perspective, to let him have the best seat.

Grateful. For backward carts + a really great dad – who gets it.